Upon further investigation it turned out that the four-eyed felon responsible for such an irreverent desecration was James Hyman, a highly-respected UK tube ‘n’ flick music industry veteran and dizzbusting Saturday night radio DJ on London’s XFM who’d altered the images to illustrate a QT mash-up disc he’d whipped up. Now anyone can mix a half-decent mini mash these days, all right, but it would take a true sonic surgeon to skillfully stitch together an album-length audiologue that effectively encapsulated the stylistic offbeat essence of multifaceted movies like Pulp Fiction and Jackie Brown.

So I did some serious scrounging around, okay, and I finally managed to cadge a copy and after hearing it I gotta testify that James Hyman’s A Quentin Tarantino Mash-Up is an absolute bona fide bravura masterpiece that doesn’t drop the beat once, all right? Clocking in at an extensively exhaustive 78 minutes, this gargantuan--I’ve always liked that word-- 55 track epic not only features music and dialogue from QT’s first four movies, it also includes vital spoken word passages from rarely heard promo-only albums like Truth And Fiction. Toss in an astute selection of other inspirational like-minded songs that QT never used in any of his films--but sure wishes he had--and you’ll know why Tarantino himself gave this marathon magnum opus his certified cool Red Apple seal of approval once he heard it.

After all, where else can you hear the Beatles backing Elvis Presley or Missy Elliott doing a duet with Steelers Wheel or Britney Spears joining the stacked cast of Girls Who Love Guns or QT himself singing “My Sharona” with The Knack after competing in a rap throwdown with Andre 3000--all masterfully mixed into one seamless thematically-linked soundscape? Once you hear Kelis creaming “Milkshake” over Luis Bacalov’s “Summertime Killer” or Tears For Fears crooning “Shout” over Tomoyasu Hotei’s “Battle Without Honor Or Humanity” or Michael Jackson’s “Billy Jean” getting on Bernard Hermann’s “Twisted Nerve,” you’ll never listen to any of your vanilla QT soundtrack albums again.

Which is exactly the point: if you’re tired of having to constantly skip past officially released offal like RZA’s “Ode To Oren Ishii” or Lole Y Manuel’s “Tu Mirá” then this must-have album is essential listening because it’s the only QT LP you’ll ever need. Unfortunately, just like a Hattori Hanzo sword, A Quentin Tarantino Mash-Up is priceless and not for sale--not even in El Paso.

So you all will know the seriousness of my warning, I shall say this in English. James Hyman, a highly-respected UK tube ‘n’ flick music industry veteran and dizzbusting Saturday night radio DJ on London’s XFM, has skillfully stitched together an epic audiologue that effectively encapsulates the stylistic offbeat essence of multifaceted movies like Pulp Fiction and Kill Bill.

James Hyman’s A Quentin Tarantino Mash-Up is an absolute bona fide bravura masterpiece that doesn’t drop the beat once, all right? Clocking in at an extensively exhaustive 78 minutes, this gargantuan—I’ve always liked that word—55 track epic not only features music and dialogue from QT’s first four movies, it also includes vital spoken word passages from rarely heard promo-only albums like Truth And Fiction. Toss in an astute selection of other inspirational like-minded songs that QT never used in any of his films—but sure wishes he had—and you’ll know why Tarantino himself gave this marathon magnum opus his certified cool Red Apple seal of approval once he heard it.

After all, where else can you hear the Beatles backing Elvis Presley or Missy Elliott doing a duet with Steelers Wheel or Britney Spears joining the stacked cast of Girls Who Love Guns or QT himself singing “My Sharona” with The Knack after competing in a rap throwdown with Andre 3000—all masterfully mixed into one seamless thematically-linked soundscape?

This must-have album is essential listening because it’s the only QT LP you’ll ever need. Unfortunately, just like a Hattori Hanzo sword, A Quentin Tarantino Mash-Up is priceless and not for sale -- not even in El Paso. But go to jameshyman.com anyway and see if you can buy one—no matter what the cost—because this unrelenting aural canvas of carnage ‘n’ comedy proves that James Hyman is the all-time undisputed modern master of the mash-up, all right?